After driving Brianna to her destination this evening, I had the pleasure of spending about 30 minutes in the car alone. Listening to K. Hahn's 10th of 12 CD's on the Mother's Rule of Life. The CD is very good, and I hope to have a complete review up soon, but tonight, something struck me.
I have been working on accepting the fact that my role as a mother is my vocation. Given to me by God. Destined for me by God. I have "known" this for years, and I am sure, on some levels, I had accepted it to a certain degree, but after studying Mother's Rule of Life by Holly Pierlot, and now listening to K. Hahn's talks, I must say, I think I finally get "it".
Doing the things in daily life that I do not want to "for the love of Jesus" makes it so much more bearable. Doing these things because Christ ASKS me to, because He entrusts these precious children to me so that I can serve Him more fully, attending to my wonderful husband, who never asks for anything, all because God calls me to do it! This is the path to holiness? And I am complaining?
It's not like I am serving the starving and dying in India or taking the place of another in a concentration camp. I have not been asked, at least not yet, to martyr myself for God. Just to get up, make my bed, and love my family, my neighbor, and God, and try to be nice while doing so. Hmmmm.... it's only taken me 15 years of marriage to have this epiphany!
I have been talking quite a bit with the kids about these things. Really just trying to make myself believe it, but how we need to do things because God calls us to do them. Explaining that God has placed them at this place in their life because He needs them to do whatever it is that He is asking them to do.
Tonight, Matthew, one of my easiest going children was given the task of taking up the basket of clothes for he and his brother and to put them away. Joseph, being only 4, was sent along to help. Well, we all know what help from a 4 year old can be like. Sometimes, not much help. More like more work! And poor Matthew was feeling that tonight. He sent Joseph downstairs, and I sent him back up. Matthew came to me with tears in his eyes telling me that he was so frustrated that he had to do so much of Joseph's work. That is was easier if he did it all alone without Joseph because, well, because...
I told him that I understood how he felt, but that it was our responsibility to help to train Joseph in how to do these things, even though it takes us longer to accomplish the task now, eventually, he will learn and then it will be Joseph's turn to help with his younger brother, Brendan. I reminded Matthew that his older siblings helped him to learn and now it was his turn.
Riding home, I realized that God has called him too! I plan tomorrow to sit with him and explain to him that God's plan is so perfect that he actually intended for Matthew to be Joseph's older brother and therefore his role model. I plan to tell him how much his helping his brother will help Joseph to grow into a fine young man. I plan to tell him how much help he gives to his father and I by doing what I ask him to. I plan to tell him how proud of him God is, because he is doing exactly what God wants.
Then I plan to tell myself the same thing. For the love of the Lord, I offer my "yes".
And now I know why the Angelus and the Divine Mercy have been so important to me this Lenten season.